This entry was posted on Saturday, February 10th, 2007 at 5:13 pm and is filed under Relationships. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
Do you ever find it a challenge to keep a happy balance in your relationship? Many couples confront this issue everyday, as they attempt to divide their time and attention to the various aspects of their lives in ways that result in mutual happiness. Several aspects of relationships should be taken into consideration when seeking this satisfying sense of mutual balance.
First, we need to look at personal happiness before we can even consider mutual happiness. They say we must first feel content and happy in ourselves before we have the capacity to bring happiness and balance to a relationship with another person. Too often people look to their significant other as the primary source of their personal joy and these results in unhappiness. It is neither fair nor realistic to expect the love of our life to be everything and everybody to us. For this reason, it is critical that each person in a relationship has their own sense of self that is independent of each other, yet compliments the other nicely. So basically, people should be personally happy, so that they can bring to a relationship their own personal sense of joy and balance. The greatest levels of happiness and love are best achieved when both people in the relationship are happy in themselves first.
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Next, we need to understand what personal happiness is. Personal happiness is unique to every individual but generally it means to have a certain contentment and peace with yourself. If we don’t first understand and love ourselves, how can we expect another person to understand and love us? To know ourselves and what makes us happy is critical. Consider the variables of family, friends and values as you start your journey of personal discovery. What matters most to you? What are your personal sources of joy in your life?
Each person in a relationship should feel complete and happy as they enter into a relationship your loved one should add to everything that you rather than make you who you are. It should be our goal to make ourselves into something that we love and admire before merging into a relationship with another person. People should be like trees that can freely stand on our own, yet together, make a forest of great beauty, happiness and balance.
As much as it is important to have a certain independent happiness and peace it is also important to recognize and gravitate toward a relationship which motivates both of you to meet your mutual goal of self actualization. For instance if someone is a great source of inspiration to you and motivates you to bloom into your true essence, you should embrace such a nurturing relationship and grow old together in balance and joy. It is important to be with someone who builds you up and makes you happy. A good relationship is one in which each person brings the best out of each other in a natural and effortless way. Keep this in mind as you enter into or continue your current relationship.
Another critical aspect of a having a happy, balanced relationship involves the division between work and personal time. It is important to find and respect that delicate balance between making a living and nurturing one’s relationship. Both are very important, yet neither one should dominate over the other. We need to work to make a living yet love bring meaning to one’s work. Couples should communicate their needs with regard to both work and leisure, so that they can conduct themselves in a way that shows respect to both and results in a productive and happy relationship together.
Finally, stay in tune with the big picture when trying to achieve balance in your relationship. It is so important to communicate your needs, wants and desires on all levels. People have so many dimensions including spiritual, emotional, mental and physical realms. Stay in balance with each other’s values and what matters to each other and you will achieve the balance and love that you always wanted in a relationship. Balance is about compromise, respect and understanding. Balance brings joy, peace and meaning into a relationship. Balance everything that matters and your relationship will thrive and grow into something strong and beautiful!
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