Advice, Dating Online Personals

Women Tell Lies, Too

With all the talk by women about men who lie, cheat and run around on them, you would think that men were the evil creatures all the time. But, the truth reveals that women tell lies, as well. And, their lies can be very destructive. They may justify it by saying that men are bigger liars. The truth is that women are bigger liars than men; men just tell more lies.

But, with all the dishonesty fed them, why do women lie so much? There are many reasons. Let’s explore them.

Some women lie because, as caring creatures, they want to spare the feelings of the man they are dating or seeing. If a woman thinks a man is unattractive or has bad habits that require her to end dating, she may tell you things that aren’t true to let the man down softly. She may have even found another man to which she is more attracted.

Some women lie out of their own security about their own self-image. If they believe that they are beautiful, successful or smart and you do something to make them look bad (in their own minds), they will often lie because they actually have low self-esteem in that particular area. It is better to tell a lie to keep up her own positive feelings about how the world sees her then to tell the truth. She may even feel the need to publicly humiliate you if, in her own perception, you publicly humiliate her.

And, if you make a negative comment about her weight, God forbid, watch out. Lies will abound and you will probably be the main target of her lies. Because women are forced by our society to always be beautiful and be perceived as beautiful, a woman must always feel beautiful (in the conventional sense) even if she is not. If you destroy this self image, you will commit one of the cardinal sins against a woman.

Another reason a woman might lie is because she has some deep dark secret, or secrets, from her past that she doesn’t want known. She may try to live any lie, or series of lies, to have a man not discover what she is trying to hide. It may be something that is not even her fault, like a date rape or a relationship with an ugly guy. It may also be to protect her past sexual behavior of which she is not proud. It is important to cultivate a relationship that emphasizes open communication about the past so that all the facts are on the table and you can start clean.

Women will often lie about male friends that they have. In the same way that a man may enjoy having female friends, many women enjoy the company of their male friends. These friends may be male co-workers or friends from the past. This is quite normal but concerns a lot of over-protective men. Because of this fact, many women, to avoid a jealous environment, will lie about doing anything with this male friend. She may have lunch with him during the day or a coffee after her evening class. These lies can do a lot of damage if a woman is caught but many women will tell them because they do not want to hurt their partners and they enjoy the company of close friends, male or female.

If you have trust issues in your relationship, in general, a woman may lie to you. Trust is something that you must build from the beginning of the relationship, even when you first begin dating. If she is building the relationship based upon certain untruths, you may be in for a surprise or two as things progress.

Finally, some women are just plain cunning and deceitful. They will lie to manipulate a man, testing him to pass some test she has developed in her own mind. By keeping the upper hand with a battery of lies, she will find out if he is the one she wants. If he isn’t, she can just dump him because the lies create no ties. A man must do all he can to keep his relationship open and honest. But, he must be cognizant that some women are not all that they make themselves to be.