Advice, Dating Online Personals

Renewing Intimacy in your Golden Years

“I still love you, I am just not sure that I like you anymore!” These sad words are sometimes exchanged by life partners who have endured together over the decades. You can finish his sentences, but no longer consider this ability as something mystical like you did when you were young. You can predict her every reaction, but you are bored, not comforted by the fact that there are no surprises left in your relationship. If this describes the internal workings of your seemingly happy and stable marriage, it might be time to shake things up a bit. It may be time to rekindle a truly intimate relationship with your mate.

Cultivating a renewed sense of intimacy and excitement in a seasoned relationship is not as difficult as it might sound. The primary rule to remember is that true intimacy needs to be fostered in three areas; the physical, the spiritual and the mental/emotional realms. You can address these realms in any order, or simultaneously if you wish, to build a more intimate and loving connection with the person who has been through thick and thin with you. 

• Physical Intimacy: Ah yes, sex! Well, perhaps, and perhaps not. Physical intimacy has to do with closeness and pleasure, not necessarily a sexual act. How long has it been since you took a long, sensual shower together taking time to gently cleanse your partner from head to toe? Have you ever slow-danced naked together totally immersing yourself in the sway of your partner’s body? When is the last time you sat face-to-face with your partner staring deeply into one another’s eyes and speaking softly about what you find there? As Mikey used to say in the Life cereal commercial… “Try it, you’ll like it!”
• Spiritual Intimacy: Couples who pray or meditate together have been proven to have stronger, closer relationships than those who practice their spiritual rituals separately. Sharing the connection you have with your Higher Power infuses your relationship with peace that passes understanding. At least once a week set aside an hour to take your partner’s hands in your own and speak to your Maker together. Share the experiences of the past week, voicing thanks for shared pleasures and asking for the qualities you feel you need to strengthen your appreciation of your spouse in the week to come.
• Mental/Emotional Intimacy: Begin each day by addressing your life partner with the sentence, “The thing I most value about you at this moment is… ” Regularly ask your partner, “What can I do today to make you feel loved and cherished?” Share the vulnerable side of yourself by asking your mate to lend strength to you when you are feeling weak. Let your mate overhear you bragging about him or her to a friend. Put voice to a warm moment and make it known to your spouse that s/he has delighted you unintentionally. “You looked so free running through the yard with the grandkids this morning!” “Boy are you a cutie pie when you wear your red hat!”

Growing old together means much more than coexisting over time in the same domicile. It means celebrating your oneness on a daily basis. It means crawling into the soul of your mate and feeling comfy there.

Wellness: Sexuality
Protected by CoopyRites for: Sexuality
Authored by CoopyRiter in: Sexuality